Choose a moment that is private, calm and not rushed.Listen to your instincts about when they are ready to know.
Things will be easier if your relationship with your parent is in a good place when you come out and you are not in arguments about other things.Their reaction in this conversation will not be their final reaction, no matter how positive or negative it is. Or, they could be shocked, sad, confused, angry or condemning. Your parents could be relieved, understanding, loving, affectionate and supportive when you come out.It may take a long time for them to become accepting and supportive as they adjust and change their view of the family and your future. Most parents go through stages similar to suffering a loss, and they must process this news. They will need time, just as you have, to adjust to this news. You’ve been thinking about this for a while, but it may be a surprise to your parents.Keep in mind that your parents are in a different place than you on this path. If you are living apart from parents and are financially independent, this is less of a consideration.If your worst case scenario is really bad, this may not be the time.What is the worst case scenario? Will you need a place to stay? Will you be able to support yourself if needed? Will you be physically safe? If you are living with your parents, or are financially dependent, consider the risks before you come out to your parents.Plan for safety, and anticipate consequences. Here are some things to think about before you tell, as well as a script help you have the conversation and some ways to handle your parents’ (and others’) reactions. Think ahead about how you want to come out.
#FUTURE COMIN OUT STRONG SUSPECT HOW TO#
This page shares ideas about how to come out, responses depending on how people react and resources for both you and your parents. The bad news is that coming out can be tough, and there’s stress knowing the conversation can go many ways. And you will feel relieved no matter what. The good news is that being honest and real with your parents can build a better relationship - eventually.
One question we ask parents on this website is, “knowing what you know today, would you want your child to ‘stay in the closet’?” The answer over and over is “No.” But that doesn’t mean there was no struggle before getting to acceptance.Īs the person coming out, you’ve been thinking about your LGBTQ identity for years, but it can take time for parents to adjust. But these tips can help you think through how talk to anyone about your sexual orientation or gender identity, whether at work, school or with friends. This page offers ideas for coming out to parents, because this usually feels like one of those “big deal” moments. With some people in your life, telling them you’re gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, or queer will feel casual and easy, while with others the conversation may feel like a game-changer.
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